S: The Good, The Bad, The Weekends

What a fantastic weekend!

Gloat. Gloat. Gloat.

My goal of spending as much time with Guy as possible was achieved. To the detriment of my home and social life. And glutes.

Friday was a bit rough. We were both tired and overly sensitive and had thought the evening would end up differently. But even though it wasn't what I had in mind and there were some less than lovey dovey moments, it was still just great to be with him. This is a different reaction for me.

When I'm with someone and I know they are frustrated with me, I have a tendency to match the mood and then crawl into my shell and hide, thus escalating the frustration. But with Guy, I feel confident enough in the relationship to know the frustration is temporary, so I don't hide and I can look at him and love him and not start thinking that maybe it is all too difficult.

The point of this being that despite our moods, we still managed to have a good night together.

Saturday was perfect. We had a great morning...enough said. And then, I had been invited to join Guy on a bike ride with some friends. This ride was supposed to take the better part of the afternoon and go for some distance. I really needed to stay home and get my house cleaned. (The place is an absolute pit right now. The cats just don't take care of it like they should.) But about 10 minutes after he dropped me off with a teasing, "It's beautiful out...you should come. You can clean when you're dead," I was texting him that I did want to go and I could clean some other time.

Like this weekend when he's gone and I am sad and lonely and pathetic.

And so, it was back to Guy's place to get suited and biked up for a long ride. And it was a long ride. For me anyway. 36 miles. With some beer stops to break it up. We would have gone 40, but the rain rolled in and we headed back home earlier than planned. At which point we decided a massive dinner of pasta and red sauce was the way to go. 36 miles! We deserved it.

O.k., now, the plan was to attend a friend's birthday party for a bit that night and then get back to "us" time for the rest of the evening. This did not so much come to pass. Apparently...and who would have guessed it...but apparently, a 36 mile bike ride and oodles of noodles will pretty much make you not want to do anything but snuggle on the couch for the rest of the night.

Which is what we did.

And it was good.

My friend will have another birthday next year and I'm sure I'll make it to that one.

And suddenly it's Sunday morning and I'm being made chocolate chip pancakes by a half naked hottie in the kitchen. So much yummy-ness in one room. I'm not sure how I even survived it.

At this point, we both thought it best to put our noses to the grindstone and get some responsible adult things accomplished before the weekend was over. Which we did. And then I remembered that an old friend was going to be in town...ish for the night and I promised to drive out to see her. So no quantity time with Guy that evening.

But we managed to sneak in just a bit more quality time...late...and eke out as many weekend moments as we could.

Because this weekend will not be so good.

And the sad news is that the weekend after that may be even worse.

I'm supposed to be going on vacation with Guy next weekend. A trip that we've been talking about for almost as long as we've been dating. A trip for which Guy *just* purchased my plane tickets as a gift. A trip that there is a good chance I will not be able to take with him now.

Because I may have just picked up a job that will cause me to miss my flight out. This is the way when one freelances. And this totally figures since I've had a really slow year. I finally get a call for a good booking that could help bolster my quickly dwindling funds and it just so happens to fall on top of the one thing I've been looking forward to for months and the one thing that can't be rearranged.

You have no idea how this saddens me. I would love to be 100% excited about this job, but I can't because it is most likely going to make me miss out on a wonderful time with Guy. AND I will have to unceremoniously return a rather generous gift. And disappoint someone who does not deserve to be disappointed.

There is a chance that the job will be complete the day before I fly out...and so my fingers are tightly crossed (which makes typing this post rather difficult). I have also found a flight and shuttle ride that could get me close to them for not too much money the next day. So, as is the usual in Sheila's World, hope springs eternal. Maybe this one time my good news doesn't have to be delivered with bad news. Perhaps I've been a nice girl and I'll get a double dose of good and get to eat the cake that I have.

Otherwise, May is going to be one long, dreary month.